Firsts

Your first kiss. Your first boyfriend/girlfriend. Your first friend. Your first 'broken heart'. Your first teddy bear. Your first crush. Your first everything.

Do you remember the feeling you got when you had your first crush? You feel weird inside. I remember my first crush was in grade two. He was my friend and we would always play tiggy together. I remember whenever this song came up on the lunch bell, Hey Baby - DJ Otzi, my crush would sing it with his friend and they would always point at me and my biffle. We'd giggle like idiots. His name was David Nguyen. He found me on facebook and he hasn't changed at all.

I really don't remember my first friend or first boyfriend. I do remember my first broken heart. Or.. when I first cried over a guy. It was in primary. Yes, in primary. He was a kid who was new to my school. Wasn't in the same class as him but we played gang tiggy together every recess, lunchtime and in the mornings before school. We became a couple. No idea how long we went out for but he dumped me one friday. The second last week of term two. Our friend came up to me at the start of the day and said '*name* said he just wants to be friends'. My response was 'yeah sure all good' *smiles*. Stupid. The next week came and he didn't come to school. I asked a friend if he knew where he was and he told me he went to Queensland. Which is why he dumped me. So i'm thinking, oh.. i'll be sure to tell him how much i like him when he gets back. Cause honestly, i was embarrassed to tell my friends that i actually did have feelings for him. It was past the two week holiday and the first day of school. He wasn't there. So i waited. Three weeks went past and i knew he wasn't ever coming back. First time i cried over a guy.

Anyway, isn't it weird when your past miraculously comes into your future after disappearing for a while? It feels like a chance to become good friends again or to relive a moment from the past. But sometimes, they just turn up and nothing happens. They're just there. Like the memories in the past. They're just there. So... maybe the past comes up in the future to remind you about the times you had, but to also remind you that they were in the past? I don't know..

First's are suppose to be good right? Like.. when you think of firsts, you'd expect it to be perfect or what not. But sometimes they suck. Like, you were too careless and didn't make a good memory of it. Though, I reckon firsts don't need to be perfect and all that. If it was bad, just use it as experience. Make it better for the future you :)

Doesn't matter if your first of something wasn't as good as you hoped it would be. Yes it may suck, but atleast you got a different kind of story to tell, instead of a corny cliche one like everyone elses.

ANYWAY i think i just rambled on. Here is a photo of my very first edit :D

(Yes.. i was directing it to my primary boyfriend)